The Cat and Mouse Game

"When I want to work, I start ignoring people (Laugh)! I dont like to be available all the times".

Before I jump to what this entry is about, let me share a story. When I was in primary school one of the first lessons I learnt was about the shepherd and his herd of sheep. One fine day in the field, the shepherd started howling, "Tiger! Tiger! Somebody save my sheep." Hearing him, all the villagers came running with their sticks and sickle. Not finding any tiger on the spot, the villagers turned to the shepherd who was laughing his heart out. "Its fine. I was just playing a prank!". A few days later, the shepherd repeated his act. Again, the villagers were disappointed and went back cursing him. One fine day, when the tiger actually came, no villager turned up on hearing the shepherd.

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October 23, 10 pm: I had an amazingly bad day and was standing at Neville street waiting for the elusive state transport bus to turn up and take me to the comforts of my home. The flurries did not make the wait any better. As I braved the snow shaking my hands vigorously, I recalled that Ashley had asked me if the CMU library would be open tonight. I took out my phone and texted her asking what she was upto and if she was at Hunt Library. She was! But she was busy. Thats fine, I wondered. Since I had already been through an exceptionally bad day, it was worth walking to Hunt to say hi.

As I walked in the cold, my fingers froze while constantly texting her on my way. As I reached Hunt, I picked up 'India Today' and went looking for Ashley. After scanning through three floors and not able to locate her, I decided it was high time I got back home. And then I saw her! After the hug, I pulled up a chair besides her, plugged in my iPod, blasted 'Kajrare' into my ears and sat down reading how the Mumbai blast case was solved? Meanwhile, Ashley introduced me to her room mate. First thought: do all the beautiful girls in Pittsburgh stay in the same house?:P. Since Ash was to drop me home now, at about 11:30pm both of us started walking towards her car.

As she dropped me home she promised to call me the next day. This was 15 minutes from my 23rd birthday. Wondering why she did not wish me then and there, I walked away feeling a little weird. "Ask Nicole to call me". Fine! As I knocked on Nicole's apartment, I could hear her talk to someone. But she did not answer the door. Weird! I texted her. Walked into Aditya's place and came out in 5 minutes to my place.

As I took out keys from my jeans and put them on the table, I wondered if I would be with a living soul when it strikes 12. Sachin was in INI and in all probability would not have known it was my birthday. As I sat down with my laptop on the recliner, I gazed thoughtlessly at the Thinkpad starting up slowly- an appropriate end to an aweful day. The machine needed a restart. Just when it was around 11:55, Nicole called. My first instinct was not to answer the call. Yet, I did. Nicole cannot lie to me anymore. She was asking where I was and how my day was? Basically, abstract shit! As I walked to her place and knocked on the door again, she replied saying she could not open the door.

"Why?", I retorted.

"Coz I am naked!".

Looking back now, how did I not say something nasty on hearing that is beyond me. Lol. But I politely asked her to put some clothes on and open the door. I stood outside her place for about three more minutes.

Someone came to the door and was opening it from inside. I walked closer to get in. As the door opened, it was one of those moments when one does not know what to say, do or how to react. It was Ashley!! What was going on? Before my mind could decipher, my eyes saw her standing with a huge cake with many candles burning on top. My brain stopped working by this moment. The eyes saw Nicole standing with a birthday card in one hand and Simon in the other . The ears could hear both of them sing "Happy Birthday to you". I froze and barely managed to smile. I guess this was the first time someone had played such a big prank on me. All my life, its been the other way round. Since the eyes and the ears took most of my processing power, my vocal chords were ordered to 'shut up' for some time.

Thank you both of you. I imagine Ash managed to pull this one off with Nicole the way we did it on her birthday earlier in the week. And in a bigger and better fashion.

I called some of my neighbours to have some of the cake. As I watched them getting acquainted with their other neighbour-Nicole, I felt at peace. This was really the first time someone got a cake for me without me getting to know of it. I felt like the rat who turned the wrong corner this time around and walked straight into the trap set by the cat.

The next evening I got bashed up in INI. Most of the kicks were bearable but the hits with the pool stick have left big marks on my body- which is still hurting very bad. I guess that took off some of my otherwise cheerful and sporting mood.

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October 25 8:25 am: As I walked to my place after a whole night spent at INI, I saw Nicole's car parked in the parkway. I texed her if she would like to have some breakfast. No reply. But I could hear her phone ringing standing outside my place. Feeling tired, I fell asleep on the recliner. Got up in the evening and ran for class. Nicole's place was closed then. Must be in class or something, I wondered. After class, I went running to the gym and was back by around 10 pm. Still Nicole's place was locked and the lights were off. I texed her if everything was fine. No reply. Hmm, that was unusual. She is not the type who would go out on parties on weekdays. And I did not know of any of her plans to visit family. As I walked by a third time, I could hear Simon crying inside.

Post dinner, it was past 11:30 pm in the night and I started worrying for Nicole's safety. I could hear her phone ring at her place. I called Ash to check if she knew where she was? But she confirmed my fears by mentioning that Nicole had not replied to her text either. If Nicole did not reply to me, thats palatable. But not replying to Ash? No way! May be she had left it in there by mistake. But, where was she? Her car was parked in the parkway at the same spot since morning and thats when Ash decided to come over with keys to her place.

"Ujjwal, pray for her".

I was standing outside in the cold wondering if 911 would have to be called soon? I peeped into the car from outside. It seemed fine. I tried knocking on Nicole's door and only Simon replied with his cries. The next 20 minutes were spending walking desparately outside in the lobby. Should I call the emergency number given by the housing management company? Should i call Jon? At that moment, waiting for Ash seemed to be the best idea.

I was still outside apartment 15 when Ash turned up. Getting inside the apartment, I opened the lights tentatively. Thank God, I did not see a body! I was really fearing for the worst when Ash walked into Nicole's bedroom. Would she be just lying there? Had she not woken up since last night? As Ash switched on the light in the bedroom, she found Nicole's cell phone but no sign of Nicole. Simon was excited to see some sign of activity after long. I served him some water. Poor chap must have been alone since I did not know when. Ashley started calling people from Nicole's phone believing they might be knowing where our friend was? Anga did not pick up. Sachin came to ask if there was any progress in the search. Negative. As we were scratching our heads for the next action, someone came up the stairs.

"What are you doing in my apartment?".

I did not even bother answering the question directed towards me. It was Nicole. As I looked at her from top to bottom to see if she was molested/hurt/sick or anything bad in the world had happened to her. She seemed fine. It was past mid night. And there she was walking back easily after freaking the hell out of us. I was a little mad at her. Ash hugged her.

"I was studying in the library! I am just a little late and had forgotten my phone back home".

How simple. I dont even recall correctly what happened next. I was just happy to see her back safe. Ash and her roomie made an exit and I escorted them down. I apologized to Ash for raising a false alarm and thanked her for being there at such a short notice.

"Nicole, I am disappointed in you". I really was. But not with her. It was more to do with the fear factor than anything else. I was still coming to terms with her being safe and sound. A small conversation followed while she had dinner. I had advised her a couple of days back against travelling alone at night without a car. But she still had.

And thats how we come back to the first line of the blog entry. How true!

"The next time you decide to cut yourself off, make sure you tell one of us". I walked out.

The next time I would not bother calling anyone and making a fool of myself post midnight. I guess it's better to leave people alone in this country with their busy schedules. I am not disappointed or bothered but just learning how to react in certain situations and that would involve controlling my 'too-caring-and-involved-in-other's-lives ' Indian instincts. I never seem to strike a balance between caring and disattachment in life. I am a little confused because that's the way I have been since the past 23 years but the past year or so has been a great leveller. Only time will tell if I win this Cat and Mouse game...